so often He says, "inhale. blow out all the yuck - the doubt, the self-hate, the criticism of others, and breathe in ME."
sometimes i move and i shake and i make noise and i flutter about and i work to make a splash in my little pond and then when it gets quiet i hear my Papa say,
"little one... shhhh... come dance.
lose yourself in the breeze and the warmth -
dance with me."
there's movement that is aimless and wreckless and not in a way that is restful
there is movement that is joy-filled
and achingly satisfying
and then i am restless and instead of throwing up my arms and soaking in the Sun
i frantically search around me for ways to fill my hungry heart
and He whispers,
"come. be with me and be filled by me
and consumed by me,"
and at last
my stubborn heart
and once again i hear the rhythm of His heart
and i partake of Him
i am filled.